A lot has been written in the last few days about Michael Phelps winning 8 gold medals. (Michael who? He's a swimmer, who last week broke Mark Spitz's record of 7 gold medals in a single Olympics, and now has 14 total gold medals, making him arguably the greatest Olympian ever). Many writers have focused on what comes next for him, and what happens once you achieve stratospheric success.
Last week, in an online chat Suzanne Brockmann fielded similar questions and discussed how she reconciled achieving NYT status and realizing that she was "still me." She writes, "It was my goal. And at the same time, I'm constantly freaked out by the fact that I'm actually to this place. I said it earlier -- I'm still me. For a while, it was weirdly hard to achieve success, because then you go, "Now what?" It stumped me for a bit." Phelps has said similar things, that he always knew 8 golds were possible, but that he's absolutely dumbfounded that it happened.
What gets me about both of their stories is that they both believed, absolutely, that their wildest dreams were possible, and they lived their lives as if it would happen. NBC has a great video detailing Phelps' training schedule and how he crams 9,000 calories and umpteen miles of swimming into each day.
So, I asked myself, how would I live if I had NYT status or even just an NY contract. What would I need to do to fulfill my obligations? How many words would I average each day? How much time spent networking? How many proposals each year? Could I start living that way right now?
And then, I spent the next 3 days in a deep, deep, dark funk as I realized that it's not just that I CAN'T live like that right now, I'm not sure I want to make those sacrifices. I visualized a week, a month, a year, spent living like that, and honestly, I'm not sure I can do it at this point in my life. And that's a rather humbling thing to realize about yourself--that you may not have what it takes, not because you lack for talent (a whole separate issue), but that you're not willing to do the hard work required.
But, this gives me a starting point. Something to strive for and wrestle with as I try to sort out that timeless dilemma of work and family. I think asking myself these questions is a really good thing, even if I don't like the answers. And then I have to ask myself WHY I feel guilty and what I can do to either change my answer or get happier with it.
Now, you try. Visualize your wildest success. Poof! You have it! You're living it. Now what. What does your day look like? Your week? Your year? What would you do AFTER you achieved your wildest dreams? Are you willing to make those changes now? To really believe 100% that your dreams will come true? If you already have a part of the dream--a contract, a book, a room of your own--what has changed about your daily routine? Your priorities? Have you struggled with the "What next?" question? Do you have the makings of an Olympic champion?
7 comments:
Wavy -- I've thought about these very things, as well. It's so hard to separate what goes into making a NYT bestseller. It's not just time commitment or a good story or the right publisher. It's almost a magical combination of those things, but you are asking if this came to you would you embrace it, so to say, and want more of it. In other words, not just if you wrote a book that made that status, but were then driven to maintain it for a career.
I'm not sure of the answer either except it would be fun to give it a try! Actually, while I was at your stage of life, this wouldn't have worked for me. It was always very clear in my head what my priorities were. It still is, but the demands on me are not as great. Yet, to think I would have additional stresses on top of the ones I have now is not such a great thought as I don't exactly thrive under pressure. I think perhaps at my stage of life, it would be a pain because it would mean more time away from the people I care about.
So, do I have the mental skills (disregarding the writing chops) necessary to carry off being a gold medal winner? I don't know. But I think I could handle a bronze or a silver just fine.
That's a great point, Wavy. Not just do you want it, but is it something you can handle and sustain. I will admit I get overwhelmed by the entire promotion side of writing I had no real clue existed before I sold. I mean, I knew it was there, I just didn't realize how much time it took or how stressful it could be or how hard it is to know what promo items are actually working for an author. What makes a NYT bestseller? I think Alice is right that it's a magical combination for many writers. Do I want it? Absolutely. Can I handle it? I'm dedicated and driven enough to learn how to handle the stresses along the way because this is something I want very much. I guess in that way, I am sort of like Brockman and Phelps. Hitting the NYT list is a goal of mine. It might not happen for a long time, but I do believe it will someday. In the meantime though, I'll do all I can to get there with each book.
Great question. Everyone's answers will be different, and it's something we all have to ask ourselves at different stages of our careers.
Thanks Alice and Eli!
I think you are right about it being a magical combination of things, but I think hard work and sacrifices being a part of it. I think of Alice missing the fourth of July, of Terry McLaughlin missing Thanksgiving, and all the hundreds of small and huge sacrifices those with deadlines (or just huge desire) make. The larger question for myself right now is what am I willing to sacrifice?
That's the big question, wavy. And it's a hard one to answer, esp. when you're unpublished and not making any money.
For me, I've sacificed TV - don't watch it anymore. I sacrifice laying around with the DH in the evenings. We still work on spending time together, it's just not the lazy do-nothing time we used to spend together. I sacrifice outtings with girlfriends - when they all head for a girls' night out or to the newest movie, I don't go because that's my writing time. And I sacrifice things like field trips (which I did my fair share of when I was a teacher, thank you very much) and "mom group activities" (which for me isn't all that much of a sacrifice because I don't enjoy these all that much to begin with). That doesn't mean I don't go to my kids' activities - I do - it just means I don't go to every field trip or volunteer for every class party because I have to work. Unfortunately, my "sacrificing" certain neighborhood/mom activities has given me the reputation as being a recluse or "not interested in hanging out with everyone else", but something's got to give when you decide to go for a goal, and for me, it couldn't be family, so it had to be what was next. I have a couple of really good girlfriends I do things with. Other than that, I keep my "social outtings" to a minimum.
I know this wasn't your original question, but I'm curious what everyone else sacrifices for their writing.
Great Blog, Wavy!
I have aspirations for a RITA- I'd like to win that award WITH a historical western. Just to prove it can be done. My husband would like me to hit the NYT list because he sees $$ signs. But he doesn't realize how much more of my time would be taken up. I would like to be there, but I'm not sure I'm up to that.
To answer Eli's what do you sacrifice. I don't sacrifice my family, though I did tell all the company I have right now that I had to have my mornings(until today when we went shopping). My sacrifices are housework, cooking, laundry, my windows are filthy, my flower beds are full of weeds. My mother-in-law smiles smugly that her prediction I was a lousy housekeeper is showing. :)
I sew a lot less, do less crafts, I don't decorate cakes any more, all the creative energy now gets put into my writing.
Hmmm... These "what if" questions always make my brain hurt. Being an NYT best seller would be cool, but that's a rarity in my genre. Or I shouldn't say rarity because it's been happening quite a lot lately. What I'm kind of wishing, and this is silly, but I can see my series as a TV series on the USA network. I'd LOVE that! USA is known for it's quirky, character driven shows.
Sacrifices. Now that the kids have flown the coup and it's just Jim and I now, I don't have to sacrifice much as far as time goes. I'm self-employed, so I balance writing with the day job (btw, the design project from hell is DONE and I'm $4000 richer for my trouble).
Speaking of money, that's definitely a sacrifice I make for my writing. Memberships, books (though that's admittedly more of an entertainment, but still), travel costs for conferences and writing related events, conference registration fees, and OMG the money I put out during the agent search. Postage is nuts, and printing out full manuscripts at $18 a pop was murder, but it was worth it. Cost of a website is minimal, but it counts. All this is tax deductible, of course, but it's still a sacrifice when I think of the dinners, concerts, plays and movies out I've missed out on.
I don't regret any of it. I'd like to attend a lot more conferences each year to network, and to give workshops. I love teaching. That would be awesome to earn an income from writing and teaching workshops, too.
Only time, and sweat equity, will tell.
Eli--one of the things that has struck me the most about parenthood is how much I enjoy it. I never would have believed it but I LOVE my moms groups and play dates and field trips and I have a really hard time not doing that, especially when the trade off is a cranky baby.
Right now, I'm honestly not making sacrifices for my writing. I think I'm at a point where I WANT to make a few again, and I think what will have to go is some of my reading time, or perhaps find new ways to incorporate my reading into my writing (i.e. more reviews, which also equals less reading time). And less TV time. But the mommy groups stay :)
Post a Comment