So, I joined this small online critiquing group consisting of 20 women a few weeks ago. I submitted some chapters of my second ms, since I needed some advice and help, as I have queried Harlequin.
All of the responses were very helpful and have helped me learn where my problem spots lie.
However, there are rules (Enter scary music here--Dum, dum, dum) And apparently I've broken them and am now Persona Not Grata within the group.
Here it is: if a person (they're all women) critiques your chapter, you crit one in return and send a "thank you" to the person. Not unreasonable.
Now, granted, I've critted something like 4 chapters, and thanked a few, but not nearly as many as I should have.
I'd had some stuff going on in my life, ie, perfecting my ms, which took up most of my attention for the last two weeks.
I hadn't logged on much until I got an email from the moderator who very nicely reiterated the rules. No prob, I say, sorry, I say, I didn't mean to be greedy, I say (which wasn't my intention).
The problem occurred when I recieved a particularly nasty email from one of the other women on the group. It was long, it was harsh, and it made me cry (but I do that easily, so no biggie.)
I sent out an apology to the group, stating it had never been my intention to take, take, take and not give in return. I informed them I would be working much harder to perform said crits and working on my internet social skills (please keep in mind--as those of you from the retreat know--I have little social skills to begin with).
This post was sent out Monday or Tuesday. Now, keep in mind that 50 percent of the posts are chatty and unrelated to crits (well, maybe like 25%, says the Queen of Exaggeration). However, I recieved only ONE response, and this was from the mediator with whom I'd already spoken with.
This is a women's fiction group, not necessarily one for strictly romance. And I write sexy romance.
I've critted a few and thanked everyone personally, but still: NOTHING.
Is it me or is this just a teensy bit rude? I accepted full culpability for my actions, made no excuses and apologized publically. But they are all ignoring me, except for a select few.
So, are they worth it? Granted, this is my first experience with one. But, have I made a poor decision. I've learned a lot from them and would like to continue, but if they keep treating me like I have cooties, I'm gonna tell 'em to stick it. I don't know, maybe I'm being too sensitive (again, NOT an uncommon occurrance.)